" Storm Report" Archive
The Storm Report: SHE’S BACK!!!
1 CommentPosted on Friday, September 15th, 2006
BREAKING NEWS!!!
OOPSIE UPDATE…guess my reliable source isn’t that reliable after all. As indicated below Ms. Large will NOT be playing a set on Wednesday at Dantes.
She’ll just be hanging out, doing whatever, you know…BUT I BET YOU ANYTHING SHE SINGS AT LEAST ONE SONG…that’s not confirmed. It’s just a feeling I have.
According to my […]
Exclusive: TSR’s Day After Chat With Storm Large!
3 CommentsPosted on Friday, September 8th, 2006
“Remember, we’re making a television show here.”
That’s what Dr. Will whispered to she-male Janelle on
Big Brother All-Stars before kicking Chicken George out of the Big Brother House and the chance at a cool half-million.
I reminded myself of Doc Will’s words on Thursday, Sept. 7, the morning after Storm Large got booted off Rockstar. […]
The Storm Report: Better Than All This
3 CommentsPosted on Thursday, September 7th, 2006
Is this my last Storm Report?
No. Not by a long shot.
As first reported here yesterday, that Storm Large was off the show, and as I said two TSR’s ago, it didn’t matter if she went home last night, because the fact is, Storm Large has already won.
I repeat, Storm Large has won Rockstar. […]
The Storm Report: Is the Party Over?
0 CommentsPosted on Wednesday, September 6th, 2006
BREAKING NEWS! SPOILER ALERT! OH HELL…LET’S JUST ASK THE BIG QUESTION…IS THE SKY FALLING?
According to a very reliable source (who hasn’t been wrong yet) tonight’s the night when the Storm breaks … crashes … burns … however you want to put it. She is off the show.
Will we see her at this week’s […]
The Storm Report: Catching that Large Time Religion
2 CommentsPosted on Wednesday, September 6th, 2006
Last night I pulled myself away from my uncomfortable mid-century modern couch and dragged my ass down to Dante’s—this town’s red-hot HQ for all things Storm Large and Rockstar: Supernova.
It was a big move for me.
You see, whether it’s masturbation or watching the Oscars, I do all of my important television watching […]
The Storm Report: Is the Tide Turning?
0 CommentsPosted on Tuesday, September 5th, 2006
Something weird is going on.
Storm is starting to emerge from the shadows.
And she’s about to explode into a giant star.
Just…like…a…SUPERNOVA!!!
I get it. I get it. I finally get it.
This is how reality TV works.
The “frontrunner” has to take a major fall (i.e. Dilana) and an underdog must emerge from the back […]
The Storm Report: Payback Is A Bitch Named Dilana
0 CommentsPosted on Thursday, August 31st, 2006
“It’s you,” said the leather clad bitch.
“YES!” the hot rocker chick shrieked in delight.
“You said you wanted it,” purred the buxom bitch.
“I always want it,” cooed the equally buxom hot rocker chick before snatching Miss Bitch by her hair and planting her face right in her cleavage.
The Storm Report isn’t muff diving into the […]
The Storm Report: Blood on the Dance Floor
5 CommentsPosted on Thursday, August 24th, 2006
It finally happened.
Blood has been spilled on Rockstar.
It happened to the poor little Ani DiFranco-cum-Sheryl Crow wannabe, Patrice. The head-banger banged up her lip during her performance of The Pretenders’ “Middle of the Road” (which, by the way, is the perfect song to describe her talents). She was trying her best to fight […]
The Storm Report: Rock You Like A Hurricane
1 CommentPosted on Tuesday, August 22nd, 2006
Storm Large is in the seventh inning stretch.
One of the last seven contestants remaining on Rockstar: Supernova it will be just a matter of weeks, and maybe even days, before we find out if Portland’s most notorious rock-chick/lounge-core singer ends up fronting a rock band that will include Motley Crue’s Tommy Lee, and some other […]
The Storm Report: Tits and Assholes
1 CommentPosted on Thursday, August 17th, 2006
Tommy Lee and those other two guys finally got off their collective asses last night and performed with one of the contestants prior to eliminating another “rocker” on week seven of Rockstar: Supernova.
And all I can say is: Oh boy, this shit ain’t pretty.
Of course, we all knew Dilana would be chosen to play with […]
STORM REPORT: Them’s Fightin’ Words
3 CommentsPosted on Thursday, August 10th, 2006
“As for who is getting kicked off tonight? It’s hard to say, but it’s time Jill or Josh called it quits, but I think the band will pick Patrice to pack up her bags and hit the road…”
That was the final sentence in yesterday’s Storm Report, but damn if I thought Tommy Lee and […]
STORM REPORT: Why Storm Shouldn’t Win.
0 CommentsPosted on Wednesday, August 9th, 2006
Is it my imagination or does it seem Storm Large is auditioning for an entirely different band than all those other crack-holes on Rockstar: Supernova? After six weeks, and last night’s performance of the Queen classic, “We Are the Champions,” which chilled me to the bone—especially that middle part where she sang as one with […]
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